Damn, if only my mouth and brain knew that!
Trust me when I say I don’t talk much, but if I know you and I love you, your ears will bleed.
Now that sometimes is good, even great at times, but not so great when not so sweet words keep flowing. If you’ve read my previous post of how I am trying to get some self control, well it seems like I am failing miserably. I did get to control my tongue and thoughts at times, so maybe not a complete failure.
I am a work in progress and that’s how god meant it to be!! But I don’t always wanna be a work in progress, that is never the end plan.
Some believe that it is never too late to say sorry, but I believe that sorry is just a way to say ‘I am regretful for what I said or did right now but I definitely can’t guarantee that anything of this sort in a different manner might be repeated or not’ and that includes me too. I am not a forgiving person, most women around me seem to have big hearts and almost always can forgive anything. Me? I just can’t forgive, do I hold grudges? No. Do I forget? Yes. Yet I never forgive. This includes forgiving myself.
Once a word or sentence or anything is said out, it’s definitely too late to say sorry. NO matter who you are talking to, you always need to stop and wait a minute, give it a little quick thought process of “Am I gonna help at all with my words of this sort right now?”
Most cases we might not have that patience or the normal working speed of that brain to think, but if we make a habit of it, I am sure it will help. How to make a habit of it??
- Count to 10/ Say Lord’s name repetitively: Counting to 10 calms your breath slows down the anxiety or anger and the blood rush. If you are a believer, saying God’s name repetitively calms your nerves and you even might realize his kind ways and words and respond completely differently.
- Walk away when you can’t control anymore: I know it seems rude, but apologizing for walking out coz you needed to calm down works better than whatever would’ve come out of your mouth. Lord only knows the horrible things running in your head. So just hold your breath and find an alone place and a wall to punch. Poor wall won’t take it too hard.
- Lost control beyond all the attempt? Apologize. Only ONCE: Again this seems too headstrong-ish. The more you keep saying “Sorry” the more the person is reminded of what you’ve done wrong and it makes it hard for them to forget or forgive, I don’t believe people are capable of doing both, then again, only my view now!! Apologize honestly and move on, unless you do, they can’t. Now know that there is a subtle way of moving on. One where you humbly move on and the other where you go “didn’t I apologize already? What more do you need?” Never ever utter that line. Never can that sentence ever make anything right.
Now I think I have a few more under the rug but I a have thing for 3 point policy. I hope these help, but pausing for a minute before you speak does wonders and no one can no it better than me, cause I know each and every effect of all the pauses I keep missing.